Still good news...

Good news today, unexpected but couldn't have came at a better time.

So today we got a call from the genetics specialist in the office we go to and as of now all results since the preliminary FISH are negative and normal findings.

Are we off the hook so to speak, yeah sort of in a degenerative way. When there are no chromosomal abnormalities involved with birth defects and issues like that there does seem to be a host of alternative options and more aggressive care to continue and remain hopeful for the pregnancy. Do I agree with the idea that if our children have a chromosomal/genetic disorder that we should accept less? No. I would have found somewhere, like I did for Aubrey to at least fight...try...habor hope till the answers were clear.

This is very complicated to explain, and I'm sure many would not agree, however...your life stands still until you know about these things. Although in your mind and heart you are on the same path with the hope and desire for the same outcome...the truth is that there are crossroads that you come to in pregnancy after a loss, any loss, that you just stand still and do anything from scratch your head to pray to inflict numbness so that you don't allow yourself to wonder prematurely down a path.

I once told someone that our pregnancies were a lot like having a treasured classic car.

Cherished, aged, well cared for, respected, handled with kid gloves, wouldn't trade it in for anything...but you hold your breath each morning you go out to start it to head off to work.

So with all the good news over the last week, I know in my heart that the Lord has touched our babies and is working with them...selfishly, yeah I have sighed a breath of relief. Truth. Reality. It has been a week since I have seen them, those little hearts a bumping along...I do hope and pray that they both are doing well after the invasive procedure and week marathon of stress on them. There is still the nuchal of 5 mm.

As to with this we will deal as it unfolds...ahhhh.

I was thinking the other day, "How far would I have to go back to be so naive about pregnancy and conception?"

12 Years.

Wow!